Reflection of 2015 :)

11:50 PM

2015 
For the most part it was a good yr, it had it's ups and downs like any yrs, there were some bad and scary moments, but those are so small compared to ALL THE GREAT THINGS HAPPENED THIS YR! :D 
I accomplished dreams and goals, 
1. I faced my fear and took a ballet class and I got to perform for an audience as the final for the class.  <3 comment-3--="" nbsp="">

2. I got my hand made pouches at my uni, CSUN ANNUAL JURIED STUDENT SHOW which was a goal of mines before graduating, my pouches also got in the Csun student illustration show which was also a goal and a score! ;)

3. I took up 6 classes - my first full load of classes for the final yr, it was stressful but I managed to pass my classes.

4.  I finally graduated :) Which was long over due haha ^^'

5. After graduating I made a goal to get a fashion internship or a job related to fashion before the yr ended and I achieved that goal with not that much effort to be honest. 
I applied for a creative assistant job for a clothing brand - VIOLET LOVE
I did a phone interview, but found out few wks later I didn't get the job position, but the designer loved my art portfolio and saw that I would be a better fit for future projects! I DID NOT SEE THAT COMING! :D 
October rolls by and I accepted the art gig for Violet Love and started on the projects! 
I'm helping with the FIRST T-SHIRT COLLECTION, by designing images for the t-shirts! :D 
This opportunity has given me SO MUCH JOY AND HAPPINESS!!! I just feel SO GRATEFUL & THANKFUL that I get to be part of something SO COOL! :D I NEVER imagined I'd get a job like this so fast, it's the closest to my dreams, which is to be a fashion designer! :) 
Having this opportunity and chance, has given me so much positivity for my future, I just feel so positive that I can't wait for 2016!!! :D I think it will be a good yr for me, I HOPE! :)

6. I faced my fear again by taking the writing exam to get my Diploma (I was sooo discouraged from not passing the first time, that I held off on taking the exam), but to my surprise I passed it! :D

7. I'll be getting my Diploma in Bachelor of Arts, with a focus in Illustration! :)

Even though 7 great things happened to me this yr, by FAR the HIGHLIGHT of my yr was taking the BALLET CLASS
Ballet is very dear and near to my heart and I loved it since I was a child. I wanted to do ballet and wear the tutu's (lol), but when my mom told me I would have to perform for an audience, I immediately said no and changed my mind, because I was such a shy child, I HATED performing for an audience or having to put myself out there, it was a scary thought, I just wanted to have fun and not have to perform.
Well, FAST FORWARD to my adult life, I still secretly loved ballet and dreamed of doing it. I really started to hate myself and hate that I let my shyness control me. So when I found out that my uni had a ballet class for PE, I KNEW I HAD TO TAKE IT! I thought,  'THIS IS MY CHANCE! This is my chance to take back my dream as a child!', because it was one of my BIGGEST REGRETS in my life! I thought to myself, it's NOW OR NEVER & I signed up for the class! LOL :D
BEST DECISION EVERRRRRRR!!! The outcome was really beautiful and I discovered many things of myself, it was a beautiful journey, it went from, "What did I get myself into?!, Maybe, I shouldn't be in this class, and oh my god, I'm not cut out for this!!! Should I have taken this class?! ;(, I feel like the weakest link! to Ok! I'm finally getting the steps down! OMG final day, I CAN'T WAIT TO GO OUT AND PERFORM, LETS DO THIS!"
I felt confused lol, because, I had some learning issues with remembering the steps and trying to learn music and counting beats (IT WAS HORRIBLE LOL, UGH MAN! >.<), I bombed the midterm, it was so embarrassing, I practiced and practiced and worked hard on getting down the steps and I actually got them down, but when it came to perform in front of my class with my group members, it was horrible, I just wanted to die, I was messing up and I actually forgot the steps and got confused with some of the steps and worse of all, I had trouble being on the same beat with the other girls in my group. I felt like such a screw up and wanted to die, it was one of the low points in that class, that I cried after class. I started to question everything, that maybe it's best to dream than to actually do it, you know, like that saying goes, Be careful for what you wish for?, yeah I felt like that.
But anywho, for the final for the class, we had to do a performance in front of an audience and the students had the option to be part of the show or not and help out with designing the show. I decided to be part of the show, because I took the ballet class for a reason, to face my fears of being shy, to take back my regret and to take back my childhood dream. Even though, I bombed the mid-term performance, I wanted another try at it, and wanted to do the final performance with my classmates.
And let me tell you......I'M SOOOO GLAD I DID IT!!! I HAD SO MUCH FUN, from the rehearsals to the ACTUAL SHOW! When the night came for the show, I WAS PUMPED UP AND EXCITED AND COULDN'T WAIT TO GET OUT THERE AND PERFORM! Being backstage you guys, I WAS SO SHOCKED OF HOW CALM AND FINE I WAS FEELING! LIKE NO OUNCE OF NERVES! I'VE NEVER FELT SO RELAXED AND CHILL KNOWING I'LL BE IN FRONT OF A LARGE AUDIENCE! I WAS AMAZED AND IT FELT SO GREAT! 









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